I sat down to watch Fox’s new reality series More to Love last night because, as a feminist and cultural critic, I felt like it was my solemn duty to do so. After 60 agonizing minutes, I can tell you that I won’t be doing that again.
Writer and fat activist Kate Harding had some interesting things to say about whether this kind of representation of plus-size women on TV is progress (and then had some even more nuanced things to say about it at her blog). I also read Marianne Kirby’s condemnation of the show here at the Daily Beast. But really, I didn’t think either of them went far enough in their critique.
More to Love is just as repulsive as The Bachelor, and for many of the same reasons. There are a boatload of women gasping about how cute the guy is; there are rivers of tears; there are several proclamations of, “This is a guy I think I could fall in love with,” even after spending approximately 30 seconds with him under the glare of cameras and lights. Both shows share that heady mix of despair (”I just want someone to love me!”) and desperation (the “look at me! Look at me!” antics). And there is similar casting: most women are white (on More to Love, there are no token black women, which struck me as odd, but there were a small handful of women who appeared to possibly be Latina), most are in their 20s (with one or two in their 30s, only to get booted off in short order), and there are a range of heights and hair colour.
So, really, in many respects the shows are exactly the same. Except More to Love, I’m sorry to say, is a freak show.
The mere fact that the premise is “lookit the fatties get with the fatty!” is what brings it to the doorstep of freak show; the execution, though, shoves it firmly into the freak show house of horror. First of all, when each woman is introduced to the audience through interview clips, her stats are also shown. Yes, age, height, weight are all there–though perhaps I should be grateful they stopped just short of BMI or waist-to-hip ratio?). And is not objectifying because…?
Secondly, the usual sobbing and mascara-running interview clips emphasized many of the women’s struggle with their weight, blaming their poor romantic track records on their body size. Now, I totally believe the women who said they had been dumped, etc. because their stupid boyfriends thought they were too fat. But framed in the context of a show like More to Love, all of life’s ills are going to come down to “too fat.” Most of the women on the show were in their 20s, and you know what? Maybe that has something to do with it. A lot of women date jerks and losers when they’re in their 20s, or have a hard time meeting the right guy. But a variable like that could never come into play on More to Love.
Why? Because the show’s narrative must be based on the premise that a fat woman’s body is aberrant in order for a transformation to take place. You know how these shows are: at the end, one woman is chosen to be The One (even though that lasts for all of 3 months, on average). In order to construct just the right romantic narrative, though, she must go from being the ugly duckling to the swan. She must be Changed by His Love, so much so that she Finally Accepts Herself. She must be Reborn by the “I’ve never felt this way before,” and “I never thought anyone could love me for me” and “I can’t believe I found my Prince Charming” lines that she inevitably utters in the final episode.
Okay, I could go on, but I’ll stop myself. The final thing I want to say is that the dude in question, Luke Conley, strikes me as a bit of an ass. It wasn’t his double-entendres that bothered me (what does he like to eat? Anything “thick and juicy”). It was his totally tacky methods for getting the women to hug and kiss him that I thought was revolting. “How do you say ‘kiss’ in Spanish?” he asked one woman. “Beso.” She said. “Can you share one with me?” he asked. “Um…” was her reply. Then an edit. Then cut to them kissing–while he was flanked on the other side with another woman. BAAARF.
Have you watched More to Love? Can you provide a justification for doing so?
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