Now, before I go into my official feminist rant about this sexist and potentially anorexia-inducing product, I have to tell you a little story. On occasion, I wear makeup. ‘Cause I like it. A lot. The thing is, I have more of an affinity for eye makeup than lip makeup. Know why? ‘Cause I LOVE eating. So, when I’m off to a dinner or some other food-a-licious function, I take one of two actions: a) I either don’t bother wearing lipstick because I know it’ll disappear anyway, or, b) I wear lipstick or lip gloss and then don’t worry about it because food trumps glossy lips. (Note: I’m also not one to sneak into the bathroom and reapply; I’m usually having too much fun to remember that my lips are naked. I know–I’m shameless.)

Sadly, however, Huge Lips Skinny Hips banks on the fact that women DO care about naked or messed up lips and that they’ll choose perfect lips over the tray of canapés that is making its way around the room. But, as advertised, that’s not the only reason why the product works. Huge Lips Skinny Hips also contains extracts from hoodia, a cactus-like African succulent, touted to be an appetite suppressant. So glob on the lip gloss and say goodbye to hunger. Or so the product promises.

Want more? Huge Lips Skinny Hips also professes to have ingredients that aid in plumping up your lips and reducing fine lines and wrinkles around the mouth. Huzzah! The answer to all of the world’s problems!

I have no interest in debating whether hoodia is an effective appetite suppressant, whether the lip gloss contains enough hoodia to suppress your appetite, whether your lips will become fuller after application of this product, or even whether the lip gloss is adequately silky or shiny. My real concern is that women are making products for women based on the assumption that we hate our bodies. I’m more than fed up with the endless policing of every aspect of women’s bodies: thin lips, wrinkles, fine lines, fat thighs, thick ankles, uneven breasts, flabby arms, imperfect skin, unkempt pubic hair, etc., etc., etc.

And, what enrages me even more is that many beauty products are increasingly being advertised under the guise of not oppressing women. Purple Lab’s website claims: “Huge Lips Skinny Hips is not promoting that you starve or even stop eating.” Right. You’re just telling women that we need to obsess over every square inch of our bodies. With all of that pressure, no wonder women are reaching for the nearest bag of potato chips.

What worries me most is the message we’re sending to young girls and teenagers. While I’m aware that lip gloss is not specifically targeted at teen girls (especially now that glossy lips are in), I do know that if teenagers are going to experiment with makeup, parents may consider lip gloss to be an innocuous item that they will permit their kids to play with. But Huge Lips Skinny Hips ain’t no Bonne Bell Lipsmackers, and if girls start choosing this appetite-suppressing gloss to add a little shine to their lips, then we’ve got a serious problem on our hands.

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